Horde Fan/Hate Mail

Property of the Horde

You have just entered the Fright Zone! Do you despise
those miserable rebels as much as we do? Let us
hear about it! Send your mail to The Horde. Oh, and
Horde fanmail is always welcome.  


So we don't have any real excuses for not answering your mail. what are you gonna do? Sue us?
By the way, here's the
Old Mail.


From: AlexandraISpears@aol.com
Date: Sun, 27 Aug 2000 01:55:30 EDT
Subject: Message for the Pathetic Horde
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com
I was just flipping through you guys' mail. Is Hordak implying he has a harem? Heh...probably Nausicaans or something.... I understand that Catra and Shadow Weaver are basically vultures. Waiting for Hordak to kick off huh? Ha! Don't quit your day job "ladies!" Who hasn't been insulted here lately? Aha! Imp! Hey yo Imp--you remind me of those kiss-@$$es I have to work with! You think you're so darned smart, why don't YOU take over Etheria? Haha! To Hordak--you are still a loser. Deal with it. Alexandra

- I don't need a harem. I'm too busy trying to get this stupid planet together so I can rule it properly. That's all I need now are more women around here.

- Ever hear of Doomberry pie? It would have worked too, if it weren't for that cursed She-Rat!

- Psst. I am the only smart one around here. I let Hordak do all the work for me, and I'm the one HE spoils. So what do you know about that?


From: Starnick10@aol.com
Date: Wed, 28 Jun 2000 18:48:24 EDT
Subject: More hailing the horde
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

hullo hord,
You are to be honored. Your evil ways should rule all. I will now ask you some very simple questions (i understand your easily confused ) shadow weaver what is the sourse of your power?
Leach have you ever had a room mate? Did he ever leave somthing to mold in the fridge?
Hordak what do you think you will do first after permanently defeating the rebels?
Catra you hurt leech how could you?
i am now done

- Evil. Pure evil.

- Mold is good stuff! You should try it.

- You see what I have to work with? I have shared a room with Grizzlor for the past 20 years. Pity me.

- Eh, quit you're whining, Leech. and as for you, cake boy. Question my authority and I'll hurt you!

- All of you! Back to work! I'm not paying you time and a half to sit around and bicker with each other!


From: "safi"
To:
Subject: I'm back!!!
Date: Wed, 16 Aug 2000 10:58:11 -0600
Well, Well, Well.......I'm baaack!!!!!!!!u may all bow down (except catra ofcourse since she is da bomb) Remeber me hordak???u know that person who is catra's biggest fan!!the person who always embaresses u..Hail CATRA!!!!!! I was just reading the last message i sent and i realized that i actuallt siad that shadoweaver is a powerful witch???that is soo sad..That wannabe sorceress can't conjure toast! I also realized that my last message was soo long ago..I figured u ppl missed me...Anyway i am not here to insult that old hag, big pile of bones(hordak) or any other horde imbacil since they have no life... I am just here to admire catra and tell her how much i talk about her on message boards..and stuff...I am ur biggest fan darling.Once day u will rule the horde and all of etheria. Don't forget to have that toothless soothsayer weaver and that oaf hordak to be ur personal slaves. Btw catra, how come u hang aroung with scorpia soo much.I mean she is soo dumb , pethetic and sad...All shera ever has to do is hold her by her tail and throw her away.. hail catra!!!!!!!!!!!!!! .ur buggest fan Karim/catra(he he he..that is the name i use on messgae boards)

- Hey, you better watch it there! Catra's my friend. Don't make me sting ya. Cuz I'll do it... I will!

- The only one here that should be embarrassed is you for admitting to worship Catra. That is just pathetic.

- And I see your vocabulary still hasn't improved. I think your spelling got even worse. So much for the education system.


From: "Suzanne Dorfield"
Date: Wed, 12 Jul 2000 01:47:22 +1000
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com
Subject: Me again <:)
Well, first of all I'll use manners and say a huge 'HI' to Shadow Weaver xoxox! Now, to heck with the manners, Hordak I challenge you for a fight-to- the-death! I know you're stronger than me, but a quick thought of your words to SW in 'Of Shadows and Skulls' and that scene in 'A Loss For Words' where you come close to taking away her powers and I just wanna kick your worthless butt, garbage head!! And trust me, if I knew just *how* exactly I could get to Etheria, I would have been in a fight with you looooong ago!! ~Suzanne, SW fan Megara Mail

- Ah ha ha ha ha ha! SNORT! I haven't laughed this hard since Leech got his hands caught on Grizzlor and pulled out half of his fur.

- That really hurt!


From: Kateleigh@aol.com
Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 23:02:01 EDT
Subject: Hello Again, to Gizzler and a few others
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

Awww... Thank you for the thought anyway Gizzler, it's ok that you can't tell a flower from a doomsday bush. Here is a handy rule for telling the difference: If Hordak hates it, it's probably a flower and if he likes it or doesn't care, it's a doomsday bush. But you get a *huggies* anyway cause I still think you cute!

Poor Leech, have a box of tissues on me!

Shadow Weaver: What do you do all day long? And do you ever date?

Catra: I know you have to date, at least your not ugly like Shadow Weaver. (sorry but it's true. You lost your looks when you went evil babe) But who is there to date around the Fright Zone, your too pretty for Hordak. I could see going out with Sundar, but he's not around anymore. Or you could seduce Hordak for his power.. but even that's a stretch... love of power can only go so far...

Scorpia: Face it... Your too slow... your not going to be able to be sting her.

Hordak: Ok... your UGLY!!! LIVE WITH IT! What "women" do you get? Who? Who? I mean, WILLINGLY! And as for She-Ra interested in you? PLEASE... She could have Bow or any other of the Rebel males.... let's think..

Rebel Hordak Cute Ugly Sweet Evil Knows when to stop No comment

I bet even Scorpia would rather have a guy who brings her a jewel because he loves her then someone who brings her jewel because he wants to poisen her...

Sweetly,
Katherine

P.S. I WUV YOU GIZZLER!!! (sometimes a girl can be strange, but I'm also Catra's fan so hey..)

- Grizzlor is blushing now.

- What kind of a girl goes for a furball like that? He looks like an overgrown ball of something your crap threw up. Ewww.

- And you're going to look like something I might barf up real soon!

- I don't have time for "dating." I have a planet to take over here!

- Who would date her anyway? Sundar and I were an item at one time, but he's too goody-goody for me. I've moved on. It's not easy dating around here though. You see what I have to work with...

- Oh I'M ugly? How about that mirror that you just broke, pal?

- You'll see how lousy my sting is when I get you!


From: "Suzanne Dorfield"
Date: Sun, 11 Jun 2000 00:17:24+1000 EDT
Subject: Hordak... well... ya suck!
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

G'day!

Yes, it's me again, this time I'm here to slag off Hordak! (and hail Shadow Weaver as usual of course! *lays offerings at her, um, feet*)Alright, first off you mindless heap of rust, I think that BOW is more macho than you! You have to be the most stupid member of the entire Horde. I've heard a lot about The Secret of the Sword movie, and it seems you started off as very intimidating. Now, for someone who hasn't seen Secret of the Sword, I find that *quite* hard to believe- I'm siding with many others when I say you became more of a comic relief as the series went on! Maybe you're losing your mind in your old age, eh?Hordak, I'll take you on any day of the week!!! I'm just dying to kick the *@$*&$# outta you for all those times you've threatened Shadow Weaver and such! Bring it on, you ^$*&^!!!Great, Almighty Shadow Weaver, you are the brains in the Horde, and your magic is, like, the greatest on Etheria! I wish I could meet you! Oneday you'll conquer Etheria, I am sure of it!

~Suz, SW fan >:)

- You people are so pathetic. You'll believe anything you see on television. I'm not even going to waste my time intimidating you. It might male you cry, and I hate it when I see people acting REALLY pitiful. Now get out of my site before I blast you into oblivion!


From: Starnick10@aol.com
Date: Wed, 7 Jun 2000 16:14:06 EDT
Subject: Hail the horde
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

Honerable brutes of the horde,
I come with two thing to say

1) REBELS ARE NOT ANYTHING MORE THAN MERE SCUM!!!!
and now that that has been said

2) I know that you will soon rule Eternia and Etheria! Okay now i am gonna ask some questions Hordak why didn't you steel prince Adam when you had the chance? Leech why don't you stand up to Catra and become force captain?

I am done now.

- I only had time to grab one brat at a time. Man-At-Arms wasn't such a lame shot back then.

- Are you kidding? She scratched me one time and it got infected. I had puss dripping out of me all over the place. I will NEVER go through that again.

- And you'd better keep it that way, squishy!


From: OliviaBelmont@aol.com
Date: Mon, 5 Jun 2000 18:52:56 EDT
Subject: Hey Catra and Entrapta...
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

Well, ladies, I have been dying to ask this question for awhile, you two seem to have some pretty cool powers and yet you serve Hordak (punter of underlings, snorter and teller of bad jokes) even though he pushes you around. (I can only guess it's because of the pay--- BTW how much are your salaries, ladies?) Why not strike out on your own? You guys don't have to join the Rebellion, you know, you could start your own bounty hunting organization--- or with your respected skills could make awesome thieves... I say shake off Hordak's boot while he's having another oatmeal pie (Perfuma told me all about you and Little Debby "Hordykins") and strike out on your own-- you have nothing to loose and a whole world of self-employed freedom to gain.

As always,

Olivia

- I don't know about Entrapta, but my reasons for staying are mostly out of respect for Horde Prime. He has promised me considerable rewards for when the Horde takes over this planet completely. And as far as I know, Hordak will become a sacrificial lamb for Horde Prime, who is intent on winning over the entire universe. How could I argue with that?

- I stick around because Catra's been my best buddy for years. I really have nothing better to do with my time. Besides, have you seen how the Rebellion lives? There's no wealth to be found there. They're so primitive. Why would we give up such comfortable accomidations? Plus, we get to boss Grizzlor around. That's always fun!


From: "Grant Lealand"
To:
CC:
Subject: Shadow Weavers brilliance
Date: Tue, 23 May 2000 00:53:51 +0100

Listen Hordak you fool! One day the real power behind the Horde will bring herself forward and then you'll see that Shadow Weaver's powers are better than anything you can throw at her, and then you'll be sorry for treating her like dirt for so long. Hello to Catra as well by the way as you are the only two people in the Fright Zone who are Inteligent. Thanks

- Shadow Weaver got her power from somewhere, you dolt! Or did you forget? I own her and the rest of this lame bunch.

- Someday we will get the respect we deserve.

- And it better be soon!


From: "Aidan Cross"
To:
Subject: Horde Mail- message to Grizzlor
Date: Tue, 2 May 2000 23:14:41 +0100

You see Bow? That's you trying to look ultra-masculine, that is.

Yours sincerely,

Aidan

- Grizzlor is getting upset! How dare you compare me to that pansy?! I'll show you musculine! Come here!

- I believe you mean "masculine," fuzz face.

- Whatever. I'm still going to beat him like a rented mule!


From: Kateleigh@aol.com
Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:34:55 EDT
Subject: why why why
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

I have few questions..
Shadow Weaver, you are smart, can't you see that the Rebels are the side to choose and go side with them?

Gizzler: I have no questions, but asides from the fact you can't count, your strangely cute in the teddy-bear way

Leech: You have an awsome power, why aren't you used more?

Catra: I just want to say that anyone so cat-like as you is just cool. Very cool. The power to turn into a cat is one I want, but can't have so don't worry. But do you think differently as a cat then in your other form? And when you were going to marry that cat guy, were you attracted to him at all?

Scopia: All She-Ra has to do is spin you by your tail and that's it. Don't you think you need to learn a few more moves?

Horde: you don't seem to relize the full potential of the people around you. Sunder was great, but you lost him. How does that make you feel? And about She-Ra's commont that you had to tie up girl's to get them, is that true? I'm sure I'll have more later, please respond ASAP!

Loyally yours,
Katherine

- I see no such wisdom in joining the Rebels.

- Look! I picked a flower for you.

- Umm, Grizzlor, that is a doomberry bush. I don't think she will have any use for it.

- Alright. You found me out. I have a very low resistance, and I catch colds often. Are you satisfied now? Achoo!

- I can transform into a panther. I am much more powerful than just some little kitten. And I always have one thing on my mind: conquering this planet. One day it will be mine.

Now, as far as the marriage goes... it was all arranged.

- But if I can just sting her once with my tail...

- I cannot compete with feminine wiles. Once in awhile we lose some good men because of those women. And I get plenty of women, I don't need to tie them up. She-Ra just wishes I had an interest in her. Jealousy will be her own undoing.


From: FuryandRampage@aol.com
Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2000 23:52:49 EDT
Subject: (no subject)
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

Catra,
I have to say you are my favorite villainess in the She-ra show, I am looking forward to animators reviving the series on television so we could see your revenge again...!

- Another day, another admirer. Where do I find the time?

- You really should stop writing letters to yourself. It's sad. People will start talking about you.


From: AlexandraISpears@aol.com
Date: Fri, 14 Apr 2000 14:41:12 EDT
Subject: To Hordak
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

We Terrans ( I think the term "Earthlings" is too outdated--too 1950's) have this holiday called April Fool's Day. Well, Hordak, I was wondering, they need a poster boy for this particular holiday and I was wondering if you'd be interested. Basically we just have to get Perfuma to give you a quick make-over and we snap your picture, preferably a picture of you getting your butt trashed by She-Ra.

You don't have to pay anything, all it costs is what dignity you still might possess.

Your friend, Alexandra

- So tell me, what is it like to live every day knowing that you are WRONG? Don't you losers realize that it was I that started your "April Fool's Day?" You're all so arrogant! I could lie and say that you were my inspiration, but it was really that band Milli Vanilli that gave me the idea. If they aren't good enough to be slaves, at least we can heckle them.


From: "Sailor Chakram"
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com
Date: Tue, 04 Apr 2000 02:10:54 +0900
Subject: OH HORDAK, A BIG MISTAKE...

Uh Hordak,
Bad bad answer, threat me like a slave... I could be a great ally, but if you prefer, I can be a wrathful enemy. Don't you see I'm a goddess I'll never die, but you foolish villain...you can be hurt, you can die, ja ja ja ja. I don't need nothing, no weapons or machines to conquer, just use my go powers. You and your pathetic horde will perish in my hands.

Velasca

PS
Catra, do you think that use a mask to become into a panther will make you better, I just need to point you, and zap, a roasted feline to service.

- (choking on his spoo) A Goddess? Ha! Horde Prime will take you on any day you feel man enough. The Valley of the Lost was made especially for those arrogant swines like yourself that believe they are immortal. Your powers do not frighten me. I'd have NO use for such ignorance among the Horde.

- Bring it on, sister.


From: AlexandraISpears@aol.com
Date: Sat, 1 Apr 2000 22:24:53 EST
Subject: To Hordak aka Dimwit
To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

When you kidnapped Adora when she was a baby, did it ever occur to you that one day she just MIGHT figure out who she was and turn against you? Boy, talk about stupidity! Thanks to that little blunder, now you got Adam and He-Man poking their noses in, and She-Ra as well! Talk about STUPID!!! How did you ever come up with that stupid idea to make her a Horde force captain?

I'm just laughing 'cause your lies and Shadow Weaver's two-bit magic didn't do a bit of good!!! Did you ever think that maybe you should have just cut your losses and leave Randor alone?

I can't help but sit back and make fun of idiots like you who don't plan for all contingencies! Haha!

Sincerely,
Alexandra I. Spears

- I would have been able to pull it off if that He-Man hadn't brought that accursed sword here! My powers are strong. She never would have known. Don't be surprised if you wake up with a face-full of warts. No one disrespects my magic!

- She was a lousy Force Captain. You've got a point there. I'm just here for the pay.

- Did you ever think of cutting your losses and writing letters to someone who cares? The Horde has no interest in the opinions of you lowly Earthlings. I have a score to settle with Randor. He will pay for beating me at Monopoly! No one cheats better than me!!


From: "the hawk"
To: empressFrosta@yahoo.com
Subject: grovel grovel
Date: Thu, 30 Mar 2000 18:27:01 PST

Dear Horde,
Hordak, I would love to serve you breakfast. Is 8:00 too early? too late? over easy it is, master! By the way, I could polish your metal and lubricate your Troopers. But only if MIGHTY HORDAK agrees. And while I'm taking TO DO notes. Does any other supreme evil person here want something(s) for me to do. Just promise to try to try to not kill me. Catra, Entrapta! I could do your nails and hair and labourous tortures. SW, I could buy you spell books and suffure your painful whippings! Mantenna, leech, I could do... stuff! Grizzlor, I could be dumber than you so you won't feel as bad (or take beatings) Imp, no offense, but I'm not helping you (unless MIGHTY HORDAK commands me to) Also, Catra, I'm not saying that I wouldn't love seeing your doll kick She-ra doll's $*&, just I'd rather see the entire Horde army dolls kick She-ra doll's $*&! And a mighty hazzah to y'all (unless MIGHTY HORDAK contridicts) HAIL!

From your #1 fan (and torturer to [e]mailmen) The (pitiful against your powers) Hawk

- You don't have many friends on Earth do you? No one here actually ENJOYS serving Hordak. The pay is lousy and we have no real benefits. Having Leech for a dentist is not what I would call a "health care package." Get out of here while you still can, you dolt!

- At least you don't have to get Grizzlor to trim your hair. Last time he gave me a mohawk!

- Listen not to these mere servants of mine. The benefits of being a member of the mighty Horde are far-reaching! Get me my eggs and I shall consider your application. In the meantime, these two will discover the pain of "Sweating to the Oldies" with Mantenna! Ha ha ha! *Snort*

- A new whipping boy ey?

- Grizzlor will show you just how dumb he is once he is done beating you like the little girl that you are!

- I could always use a friend to help me clean my suction cups.

- Now that is just sick.


From: "the hawk"
To: empressFrosta@yahoo.com
Subject: Aren't I one of those people you wish would JUST stop writing???
Date: Wed, 15 Mar 2000 13:48:53 PST
Helloooooooooo, Horde! That's right, I'm back again to grovel at your feet and say "hail Horde" and all that stuff. Why? Two reasons. 1) Why would I spend my time hailing....*shudder* the REBELLION?? 2) You could crush me like an ant. No wait. Is there an easier bug to squash than an ant? If there is, you could crush me like that bug! I'm scared of you! Another thing. I just thought of one person I forgot to mention in the first letter saying all that stuff about you guys. ENTRAPTA!
Entrapta, you are so cool. You look very pretty (just like catra and sw) and have cool powers (just like...umm...everyone!) But I never saw you on the show... only in the toys. Which brings me to another point. Why was it that only Catra and Entrapta were in the toys. I would have loved collecting the whole Horde collection (especially Hordak, SW, Catra and Entrapta)
By the way, im sorry that grizzlor never got a valentine (mainly cause he pounded me) so here's one now.
HAPpY VAlenTiNz DAy 2 U frm tHE hAWk
Bye (hail hordak, sw, catra n entrapta)
from the (annoying) hawk

- You should all bow to the greatness that is the Horde! And because you realize the full capacity of our capabilities, I will allow you to serve me breakfast every morning, Hawk. I take my eggs over easy, and they'd better not be rubbery or it's the slave mines for you!

- I was in the show, but they felt that my presence would overshadow Catra so I wasn't used very often.

- I will just remember that you are my friend, Entrapta, and pretend I didn't hear that. I could have her replaced at any time. As for your question, Hawk, action figures were made of us because we're the best.

- The best what? Kiss ups? You mere mortals could never do justice to the greatness that I possess.

- Oh sorry about, buddy. Thanks for the Valentine. Grizzlor feels much better now.

- You'd better not have any Valentines passed around in MY Fright Zone!


From: "fraser11"
To:
Subject: RE:Horde
Date: Tue, 14 Mar 2000 18:32:31 -0000
Hi there my name is Fraser Brooks
I have liked the Horde for a long time these are my favorite people
1. Hordak
2. Horde Prime
and Mantenna

- We're the best! We're the best!

- What? No Grizzlor?! That does it. You better run, Fraser!


From: "Sailor Chakram"
To: EmpressFrosta@yahoo.com
CC: empressfrosta@yahoo.com
Date: Tue, 14 Mar 2000 06:22:27 +0900
Subject: TO THE HORDE: a question to Hordak
Hello Hordak,
My name is Velasca, evil goddess of chaos. I was trapped by Xena Warrior Princess in a Lava River. If you free me from here, I'll join the evil Horde to conquer Etheria, Eternia and the whole Universe. I sent you a photo of me, using my thunder powers, I'm a very dangerous weapon against The Rebellion.
(Sorry, Valesca, we lost your picture)
Awaiting your response Hordak.
Velasca
Goddess of Chaos
PS
Catra!, if Hordak free me, I'll turn you into a little kitty and I'll take your position as Force Captain, ja ja jaaaaaaa.

- I am always looking for new slaves, thank you. Now get back to work!

- You do not scare me, Velasca. You think you're the first person I've had to fight to keep this job? Take your thunder powers and go fight Glimmer or something.


To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com
Date: Tue, 22 Feb 2000 23:26:14 -0800
From: "Judo Sista"
Subject: more qestions for all you cool horde guys!
Organization: ChickMail (http://www.chickmail.com:80)
Okay, well first off, thank you for your replies to my last questions, and would you mind if i asked you just a few more? (i probably should've asked this along with the first e-mail, so sorry!)
Hordak: you seem to want to capture Adora so much, like in that episode 'Friendship' where you got someone to betray her to bring her back. why! i mean, she's a good fighter in very pesky to the horde now that she's a rebel, but wouldn't it be easier to just... do something else! i don't know, something like getting Shadowweaver to cast a death spell on her!
Shadowweaver: so now that you're a witch, does this mean that you do that whole routine where you slit your wrists, use that symbol of the star in the circle and things?
Mantenna: i thought if anyone would know the answer to this, you would- is there anything besides water in that trap door!
Well, that's it from me, and i hope you get your victory ove the rebels soon!
~Cassy

- Nothing infuriates me more than the way that miserable Adora betrayed me. I want her to suffer! She's of no use to me is she's dead. All of my followers know that is my policy.

- I am NOT a witch!

- Uh oh. Here it comes...

- I am a SORCERESS! There is a huge difference. You silly humans think that witches have powers? What a joke! I'll show you power...

- This could take awhile so I'll just say that, yes, there is more than just water down there, but I am not saying exactly what. It's too disgusting for words.

- Circles in the sand! What is THAT for... Do you call upon the power of the sun with that. Don't make me laugh! My power is beyond anything you could imagine...

- Shadow Weaver! Stop your rambling and go clean up Mantenna, this instant!

- Yes... mighty Hordak.


Reply-to: "KARIM SAFIEDDINE"
From: "KARIM SAFIEDDINE"
To:
Subject: Catra! i'm back.
Date: Tue, 15 Feb 2000 15:55:13 +0200
Organization: SAFIEDDINE
Well, well look at what the cat dragged in. That stupid hawk person. Saying that i'm annoying. Ho wpethetic he really is. But i agreee with grizzlor why don't u send him a valentine since ur such a loser. Oh what is that name: the hawk. Birdy want little peckes of bird Food. for the first time i think that sahdoweaver should cast a spell on yopu and get rid of you . I still love catra. And if u look at all the emails i ahev sent u can agree. Just look mat the old mail section.HA ha.
Why is the world so filled with morons.
Love u catra
oh adn i am starting to think thaqt shadoweaver really is powerful
karim

- It's about time you wised up. But don't think that just because you've shown me a miniscule amount of respect, I'm going to start casting spells for you as favors. I believe you owe me a little more than that!

- Another day, another letter with someone fighting over me. *sigh* What a life I'm forced to lead.


From: Skeletor75@aol.com

Date: Fri, 11 Feb 2000 23:00:25 EST

Subject: Fanmail

To: Empress Frosta

Dear Catra,

I know I haven't written to you in a long time. I've been busy as usual. You wanna exchange jobs? I wouldn't mind being a Force Captain for a day. Then again, I wouldn't wish my job on my worst enemy.

Anyway, I'm babbling. What was I going to say? Oh yeah! What with Valentine's Day right around the corner, I figured you could use a little cheering up. I also figured I should return that sweet gesture you gave me for my birthday a few months ago. *still blushing furiously* I realize how gloomy The Fright Zone can be. (Well, not counting the time when Perfuma decided to do a little *ahem* re-decorating! Where were you that day anyway?)

Well anyway, I hope you have a fantabulous Valentine's Day and I hope to hear from you soon! Take care. Edwin

- You have seen what I have to work with haven't you? My job is no picnic. The day Perfuma played "Suzy homemaker," I made myself scarce. I did not want to get in Hordak's way when he saw all those flowers. I was not named the Force Captain for nothing, you know. I have to be the brains of this operation. Thank you for the Valentine greetings. We don't celebrate the holiday in the Fright Zone (I think Safie once sent Hordak a baloon bouquet so now the day is banned here). It was no problem, sending you a birthday card. You're one of the only people that appreciates me and understands that hard work that I do.

- STILL no Valentine for me! Now you're in trouble, earthlings! I'll crash ebay again!


From: "the hawk"

To: empressFrosta@yahoo.com

Subject: Im baaaack!

Date: Thu, 03 Feb 2000 12:55:19 PST

Hello once again! One thing before I begin... please change my site adress (it's not right) change it to : http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/corridor/1849/domain.html (you forgot the 1849) thank you. I have solely come to say once again THE HORDE RULES!!!! If only the series went on then I know you would have won! GO CATRA SHADOW WEAVER AND HORDAK!!!! YOU DA MAN/ROBOT, WOMAN/CAT AND WOMAN/SORCERESS/WHATEVER-YOU-LOOK-LIKE! Happy valentines to Shadow Weaver and Catra! You can defeat *shudder* Adora (bleeeuch)! YOU HAVE THE (really cool evil) power! From the person who is almost as annoying as KARIM SAFIEDDINE because I keep writing back, -The Hawk

- Now THIS is the mail you're supposed to be fetching, Catra!

- Why don't I get any Valentine's? Do you want Grizzlor to hurt you?


From: TeelanaDawnfire@aol.com Date: Wed, 2 Feb 2000 00:53:36 EST

Subject: the horde

To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com

Dear Shadow Weaver,

Why do you put up with Hordak at all--he's an idiot and you could probably overthrow him if you put your mind to it.

Also, Hordak, why the heck are you so stupid? What, mommie dropped you on your head too many times as a wittle baby?

And while you were on Eternia, why didn't you try attacking Castle Greyskull? Are you so afraid of one little sorceress? Teelana Dawnfire

- As much as I hate to admit, it is the Horde that I owe my power to. It's hard enough for me to say that...

- Oh so I'm stupid now? (snapping fingers) Grizzlor! I think it's time you took a trip to Earth. So stupid I am that I gave up on that worthless planet known as Eternia for a new planet I knew I could rule, without conflict.


To: empressfrosta@yahoo.com Date: Sun, 30 Jan 2000 05:13:56 -0800

From: "Judo Sista"

Subject: the horde fan-mail

Organization: ChickMail (http://www.chickmail.com:80)

Hi all you horde guys! i have a few questions for you-

Hordak: why-oh-WHY do you always send robots to do dirtywork for you? i mean, you see the way she-ra and all those other rebels take them on, they don't have a CHANCE! wake up!!

Catra: OK, we ALL know you're pretty, but, uh, why the blue hair? kinda spoils it a bit!

Grizzlor: how many people have you beaten up this year?

Scorpia: does your tail actually sting and poisen people like real scorpians?

Mantenna: you're cool, but as for your voice? was it always that dormented?

Shadow Weaver: alrighty, if you had a choice between white magic and black magic, each equally powerful, whic would you go for?

Imp: did you come from beast island originally?

I think that's it, besides Leech, but i regret to say i haven't seen the show in so so long that i've forgotten him!! so sorry, Leech! ~Cassy

- In case you haven't noticed... it is very hard to find good help on this planet (gesturing to his minions).

- My hair dresser got the colors mixed up again, ok? She has already paid dearly for it (sling a sack with another head down next to Modulok's lonely one). Now, anymore questions?

- Well, let's see... There was Saffie and Mantenna and Leech. How many is that so far? Five? No, that can't be right (scratching his head). Two? (getting irritated) Oh you think it's funny? Grizzlor is getting angry now! Not enough ok?!

- Yeah I can sting people, but my poison has gotten kind of weak lately.

- (laughing) That's because you got Catra mad, asking about her hair.

- That's not true! It's just a rumor she started!

- I don't understand what you mean.

- Oh yeah, nothing gets by these guys...

- I belong to the dark side. Stop trying to turn me to the light. It's hurts my eyes.

- I'm from Horde World!

- That's why Hordak likes him so much. He was a present from Horde Prime.


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